TIme Investment: One of the Best Investments for your Kids.

Okay.. I'm guilty. The way I hold my phone it's like it's glued to my hand. I've been trying to reduce this bad habits but my phone won't stop buzzing with WA and Telegram notification. Okay, I've tried muting them for a year, but I swear I could hear it buzzing.

I learn this from my son. He was reading something the other day. I asked him something, he literally and immediately closed his book, put it aside and look straight at me. I was shocked.. and mostly embarrassed. He simply put it down.  I was his centre of attention. 

I, on the other hand, will answer without even looking at my kids whenever they ask me anything. Sometimes, when this happens, I'll say.. sorry sorry.. can you please ask again, then I answered my very same answer but this time, while looking at them.

He likes helping me rinsing the dishes. He said, he loves talking to me. It's sad, because the only time I have for him is when he's helping me and my hands are too full to do something else and my minds are not cluttered as washing dishes do not require thinking.

When I had a maid, Neng, the minute my kids came back from school, they will rush straight to the maid's room. They went rushing as though they have something really important to tell. One day, I got the answer. They were so excited they forgot to close the door and I saw them around her. She was laying down on her tummy with her hands resting under her chin and her face looking excited. I was amazed. She looked as though she was watching a movie. My kids chatted happily, telling her what happened at school. Sometimes I hear them giggling. They were all looking genuinely happy.

The next day I asked her. She told me, she didn't get to go to school. She had to quit school so she loves listening to my kids telling her about their school life; friends, teachers or anything which tagged school with it.

We tend to 'know' our kids' stories because we have been there. We make assumption when our kids tell their frustrations at school and it is always our kids to be blame. We tell them to be a little bit patient a little bit of this and that but we'd rather hear ourselves talking. :(

I read somewhere, kids need to spend at least 3 minutes with us immediately after school. 3 minutes! That is way lesser than updating our facebook status. But somehow, we choose to update our status, ignoring our kids who are updating their status, live!

It's gonna be hard, beating technology,  but I have to keep on telling myself, one day, when they are all grown up, we will be the one craving for attention and if we don't invest listening to their stories, they might do exactly how we do now because that's how they are taught the way it should be. Close bonded relationship is an investment that you will never regret. The fruit is just too juicy and rewarding.

I believe, if you listen to them or spend time, they will look for you every time they have things to say; be it their excitement or problem and when the time comes when you crave for their attention, insyaallah, they'll be there for you..

TIme Investment: One of the Best Investments for your Kids.

Tuisyen Anak Sendiri. Boleh ke?

Ada jugaklah, yang bila tahu kita bekas cikgu atau bila attend kelas baking atau English camp yang kita organise, terus mintak buatkan tuisyen untuk anak-anak depa. Ramai jugak jiran yang minta buatkan tuisyen. Saya tolak mentah-mentah. Pernah juga cuba tapi tahan sebulan je. Letih melayan karenah parents sebenarnya kalau nak buat tuisyen. Mestilah parents nak tengok result selepas hantar tuisyen walaupun seminggu. Cikgu kalau terrer macam mana sekali pun.. tak kan boleh nampak result exam naik mendadak dalam masa sebulan.

Alasan (sebab sebenarnya.. bukan alasan) paling popular yang selalu saya bagi ialah takut anak-anak kecil hati. Saya jarang mengajar anak walaupun saya (bekas) guru. Selalunya masa saya mengajar ialah setelah mendapat result exam. Dengar tu! SELEPAS EXAM! terutama sekali bila dapat result teruk. Teruk kan? Tak teruk langsung (sebenarnya)!!!!

Sebenarnya saya memang cengkelat bab ajar anak. Macam orang lain jugak, saya lebih suka anak-anak belajar di sekolah. Cuma saya tak suka hantar anak-anak tuisyen. Alasan saya memang sangat bodoh. Saya kesian kat anak-anak. Kesian kalau anak-anak jadi kelam kabut dan saya lebih suka anak-anak sibuk main pada waktu ini dari sibuk belajar.

Anak-anak saya memang bukan straight A's student. Saya memang bukan super parent. But then again, walaupun ramai yang beranggapan A itu lebih mungkin dapat menjamin masa depan, kami (saya dan suami) tidak merasakan begitu. Bukan defensive sebab anak-anak tak dapat semua A tapi kami rasa ada lebih banyak benda yang lebih penting dari A. Nak tahu apa dan bagaimana kami mula memikirkan apa selain dari bilangan A? Tunggu entrynya nanti. Tungguuuuuu

Tuisyen Anak Sendiri. Boleh ke?

Of Superman and Supermom.

I've unnececessarily super sensative and super negative lately. Orang tak kacau pun. Kadang-kadang orang niat nak menolong but somehow sometimes it makes you feel like a bad mom.

In my other negative words, some mommies thought that they are sooo perfect that whatever comes out from their mouth makes you feel imperfect in so many ways..

I bend the rules with my kids to get them do things in the house, I give instant noodles, I scrutinise the way they cook giving them details that they got sick of it, I use lollipop as reward, I give breakfast and lunch combined at one go. Breakfast means digging in the fridge for bread (yes, we keep bread in the fridge) and eat it with whatever available while I still sleep. During meals, I normally eat while they help little brothers to eat and they clean up everything while I drink nescafe with dear hubby.

The bottom line is I have a looong list of things that makes me a monster mom. I know how monstrous I can be but I just hate it when people make me feel that I'm one by making certain remarks, give details on how perfect they are as moms. Maybe they are too busy collecting details to inspire other moms but the truth they do not realize how demoralizing they can be.

I vote that we should let MOMs be perfect in their kids eyes. Every mom is perfect in their own way... Try not to judge because like other monstrous moms out there.. there are also other goods things that we do that our kids idolize us soo much. We just don't shout and tell the rest of the world. PeAcE!

Of Superman and Supermom.

Kuih Raya | Mungkinkah Saya Tidak Pandai Ambil Peluang?

Hmm.. Cerita pasal kuih raya ni.. semenjak saya mengajar di sekolah dulu, memang saya menjual kuih raya.. Masa tu memang tak menang tangan sebab yang beli kuih tu kawan-kawan guru. Bila saya berhenti.. saya masih lagi menjual.. minta tolong kawan saya tolong ambilkan order. Tahun ini pulak, saya serba salah. Harga kuih raya memang melambung tinggi. Terlalu tinggi sampai saya tidak berani meniaga secara terang-terangan. Bayangkan kuih memcecah RM30. Malah ada yang lebih. Mungkinkah mereka menggunakan bahan-bahan yang mahal seperti mentega tulen, icing sugar brand 'King' atau menggunakan badam atau kekacang lain. Mungkin juga mereka terpaksa upah pekerja untuk melakukan kerja-kerja mencetak biskut dan terpaksa menyewa tempat untuk membuat kuih menjadikan kos mereka lebih tinggi.. disamping komisyen penjual.

Tahun ini, saya sekadar menjual pada kawan-kawan rapat dan 'regular customer'. Kawan-kawan yang biasa beli awal-awal sudah membuat tempahan, ada juga 'regular customer' yang sudah bertukar nombor dan tidak dapat dihubungi.. Di Facebook, cuma letakkan gambar sahaja untuk kawan-kawan yang memang menunggu ketibaan Sampret. Marble Shortbread tahun ini berehat walaupun ramai yang bertanya. Margin Marble Shortbread memang tinggi berbanding sampret tapi saya mengalah.. Saya tidak punya modal dan besar apatah lagi modal masa. Marble Shortbread memang mengambil masa untuk disiapkan..

Saya tertanya-tanya.. mungkinkah saya tidak pandai mengambil peluang berniaga. Kenapa tidak saya tidak 'mark up'kan harga setanding harga orang lain bagi mendapat untung lebih.. apatah lagi bila saya tidak menggaji pekerja. Bukankah lebih senang kerja? Bila berkira-kira, cuba untuk menyesali kebodohan saya kerana tidak pandai mengambil peluang.. saya membuat keputusan bahawa sayalah orang yang paling pandai mengambil peluang. Alhamdulillah.. saya tidak perlu menyesal kerana saya telah pun merebut peluang yang hanya datang sekali dalam hidup anak saya. Saya berbelah bahagi kerana Ramadhan inilah bulan terakhir Muhammad menyusu. 7 Syawal merupakan tarikh akhir Muhammad akan menyusu kerana dia akan genap 2 tahun. Saya tidak perlu memilih antara duit lebih atau menyusu kerana saya tahu apa jawapannya.

Alhamdulillah.. ramadhan telah pun berakhir.. dalam tidak mengambil 'order' seperti tahun-tahun lepas, keuntungannya lebih kurang tahun-tahun lepas dan saya juga bingung memikirkan dari mana keuntungan itu diperolehi.. Mungkinkah ini yang dipanggil keberkatan.. Alhamdulillah.. syukur.. kami sekeluarga juga merasa bertarawikh di surau (walaupun saya terpaksa korbankan beberapa hari bertarawikh sendirian di rumah) dan bertadarus walaupun sedikit tetapi istiqamah bersama keluarga (cuma kami ketinggalan 3 hari yang terakhir kerana kepenatan).. dan belajar untuk berqiamulail sejurus sebelum sahur bersama anak-anak.

Doa kami agar Allah memberi petunjuk dan hidayah kepada kami agar lebih istiqamah dalam beribadah di samping melakukan kerja-kerja duniawi.. amiin.

Kuih Raya | Mungkinkah Saya Tidak Pandai Ambil Peluang?

Syukur | Harus Disemai dan Dibaja

Pernah juga terdengar rungutan ibu-ibu tentang anak-anak yang tak mahu menjamah makanan yang dimasaknya. Hmm.. sakit hati bila dengar. Sebenarnya Nina ni antara yang bertuah.. sebab masa Nina mula-mula bernikah dulu, memang tak pandai masak langsung. Teringat masa tingkatan 4, mak dan abah pergi haji, nina goreng ikan sampai dah tak rupa ikan. Tension sebab masa tu sepupu temankan di rumah. Takkan nak tunggu depa balik kerja dan tunggu depa masak pulak. Tapi alhamdulillah.. nina bertuah dianugerahkan seorang suami yang menghargai masakan nina walaupun sekadar kicap dan telur mata kerbau.

Yang paling bestnya.. bila suami tak komplen, anak-anak tak berani la nak komplen. Kadang-kadang malu sendiri, macam hari ni, tak sempat nak masak.. memang kami dinner 'scrambled egg' dan roti mayonaise dan sos! Anak-anak memuji-muji sedaplah.. "terima kasih sebab masak sedap sangat!! Ibu memang pandai masak!" Nina pun cakap, "Alhamdulillah.. ibu bersyukur sangat sebab dapat anak-anak yang bersyukur dengan makanan yang ada walalupun makanan tu simple!"

Sebenarnya syukur itu perlu dilatih! Alhamdulillah itu harus dipraktikkan.. Bila dipuji, mesti 'demand' anak cakap Alhamdulillah.. kerana yang cantik itu ciptaan.. yang hebat itu penciptanya.. Bila nina bandingkan dengan lukisan.. Marah tak kalau orang puji-puji lukisan tu tapi buat tak tau je pada korang yang melukis.. Terdiam semua!

Syukur itu satu nikmat. Makanan itu satu nikmat apabila kita bersyukur! Jika anak-anak merungut makanan tak sedap, ibu bapa bertanggungjawab untuk betulkan. Jika pakaian mereka bukan baru dan "handed down" maka ibu bapa mesti ingatkan mereka. Sebagai ibu bapa pula, seharusnya kita juga bersyukur dengan makanan yang ada.. Habiskan makanan dan ajar anak-anak menghargainya. Mana mungkin anak itu akan bersyukur jika ibu bapa sendiri membuang makanannya. Ingatkan mereka bahawa Rasulullah tidak akan berkata apa-apa tentang makanan yang tak sedap. Siapalah kita berbanding dengan Rasul yang maksum.

Naufal, anak sulung nina pernah bercerita.. dalam satu majlis, rasulullah menghabiskan makanan tanpa meninggalkan sedikit pun untuk sahabat-sahabatnya. Bila ditanya.. baginda menjawab tidak sedap jadi baginda menghabiskannya.. (biar orang tak rasa dan tak komplen!).

Jadi kawan-kawan semua! Didik tau anak supaya bersyukur dengan apa yang ada.. Jangan asyik nampak apa yang tak ada dan merungut apa yang memang telah Allah kurniakan di depan mata! Ingatkan anak-anak tentang nikmat deria! Tapi sebelum tu.. kena latih diri sendiri tau! Alhamdulillah.. Allah berikan aku peluang untuk hidup sehari lagi!

Syukur | Harus Disemai dan Dibaja

Coretan Ibu..

Entah kenapa, masa anak-anak peluk nina sebelum tidur tadi, hati memang jadi sebak. Lagi-lagi bila anak perempuan nina peluk. Teringat masa dia kecil, memang nina kurang bercakap dengan dia. Bila tukar lampin pun senyap saja, asyik bercakap dengan yang sulung. Bila umur dia 4-5 tahun, baru nina perasan yang kami kurang bercakap.

Yelah.. masa dia lahir, yang sulung tengah ramah bercakap, umur 2 tahun.. Dah lama-lama tu baru la perasan yang nina memang jarang bercakap dengan yang nombor dua dari dalam perut lagi.

Alhamdulillah.. bila dah terperasan ada gap, kami cepat-cepat 'fix that problem'. Memang kekok sebab anak perempuan ni lain sikit, 'meleser' memanjang.. jalan nak pegang tangan. Pastu kena 'giggle-gigle', kena geletek-geletek. Anak sulung tak gitu, bila dengan yang kedua ni memang lain sikit.

Macam mana kami boleh perasan yang kami kurang bercakap.. Nina sedar yang kami lebih suka berutus surat (betulll.. kami ada buku special.. saling tulis surat.. tapi taklah hari-hari).. Anak yang sulung pun ada jugak menyebut.. "jeles tu.. nurul ada buku surat dengan ibu".. tapi nina bagitau dia, "naufal kan selalu teman ibu masak" :D

Dah jadi ibu ni.. terasa macam celebrity pun ada.. bila makan orang ni merajuk nak duduk sebelah.. yang lagi sorang merajuk, nak tidur dengan ibu.. yang lain merajuk sebab asyik orang ni yang temankan masak. Yang tak larat tu bila semua nak masuk kendong.. suruh dukung la.. nak naik atas kaki ala-ala superman la.

Siapa kata menjadi ibu ni senang? Sekarang ni.. bila nak bahagi-bahagikan perhatian pada kelima-lima anak pun pening jugak sebab lain anak, lain kerenahnya.. lain jantina lain ragamnya. Am not complaining.. alhamdulillah dengan anugerah Allah.. cuma takut dengan amanah yang Allah beri.. Semoga nina dapat menjadi ibu yang terbaik buat anak-anak.. amiin..

Coretan Ibu..

Still Learning to be a Mom..

That's what they say.. Teacheable two, terrible three... and I agree.. totally..

Last weekend, a relative of my husband came over.. and that was when I realized something has to be done before it's too late! At the beginning, my son was playing a good host with his second cousin.. until I asked him to share his cars.. (if only I didn't ask him to bring down his cars but then, that made me realize how big the problem is.. hehe). I was very much convinced that he was really good at sharing.. because before that he was sharing his puzzle, toys and stuff from the basket.

He was trying to attach his 'hotwheel' to make a complete track when the 1-year-old boy tried to join.. I was busy chatting to even pay attention to him. I didn't even realize he took down the 'hotwheel', if I knew, I would have asked him to keep it upstairs because it takes space! The last thing I know, he was screaming to the boy and cried.. then, I was the next target.. and he knows I don't normally scold my kids in front of guests.. Aha! Smart boy.. He needed to test his theory and he did in in front of a line of spectators...

Our Rule
#1 Anything can't be shared will be confiscated!
(Disebabkan ayahanda marah, harta ayahanda akan dirampas seluruhnya!)

Everyone in this house knows perfectly well of this.. so, my boy was screaming his heart out trying to abolish this rule.. I could see my cousin pretending to read the recipe book (I bet she read the same ingredients again and again without really capturing the words.. he he) and I really didn't want to give in. This is a test, remember..

Their rule:
#2 Don't even think of testing the rules in front of Big Daddy... you'll never win..

The "test" went on with a lot of staring.. crying.. (I was crying inside of course, trying to hide my embarrassment) foot stumping.. wailing.. sobbing.. but I still insisted not to give back his toys.. He will think that all those action will win whatever toys confiscated... Alang-alang malu.. biarlah malu terus.. After all, my cousin has 4 kids.. I bet she has gone through this.. The thing is .. my auntie was there too.. but I really salute her because she didn't even interfere like grannies always do..

This was hard.. I kept glancing at the clock.. my husband still hasn't come back from Friday prayers.. Then, it was time for my test.. "Eh, Nurul, abah dah balik ke?" I asked my daughter.. There was a pause in his crying and he even stopped crying at least until he found out that my husband was not home..

At this point.. after a few painstaking minutes, my husband did come back... I was jumping up and down (in my mind!) That shows how in control I am when it comes to my kids.. [sigh] but then, I really don't like punishing or even scolding my kids in front of people..

Still their rule
#3 Act nice in front of Big Daddy
I know instantly.. this test is over the minute the sound of my husband's car was heard.. He was in his normal behaviour pretending like nothing happened.. My auntie said "Dah penat nangis agaknya".. I smiled "Taklah.." then I pointed at my husband.. "oooooh"..

My other cousin asked me.. "Selalu macam ni ke?" and I guess you know the answer "tak langsung, saja test la tu..."

Suddenly my memory flashed back my very first child, wailing at the supermarket years ago.. in attempt to get what he wanted.. What I did was move a few feet away to let him take the embarrasment alone.. At the end of the day, he was embarrassed, he didn't even get the things that he wanted, the shopping trip was cancelled.. we went home immediately and he was scolded in the car! That comes to my next rule..

Our rule
#4 Never give in no matter how embarrass you are.. if you intend to win the next few battles..

Believe me.. once they know they can control you.. they will control you.. It's really easy to bribe or give them what they want when they are still young as cheap toys can free you.. but imagine 10-15 years from now..

My rule.. pleeeassse don't follow the first part of the rule : (
#5 After you have finished blabbering when the guests are gone, don't forget to talk him out when both of you have cooled down..

It's really hard not to piss off.. I really pissed off this time.. The minute the guests were gone.. I really nagged.. blah blah blah.. I know it is not effective at all.. but then, I'm a normal human being.. I NAGGED A REALLY LONG NAG! I avoided my son for the whole day and by night I know he was really sad by me ignoring him.. and he knew he caused it.. Though we made up earlier.. shaking hands apologizing and kissing.. I held grudges. (it was bad of me, I know but then I needed some space)..

The very next day, I talked to him nicely.. telling him how upset I was when he threw tantrum.. I know this is not over yet.. but in the meantime, I'll find ways to make things better.. Isn't that part of my job as a mom? Wish me luck!

Still Learning to be a Mom..

Tips Melatih Anak Puasa

Masa menunggu di hospital masa check-up, risau tengok budak-budak asyik makan snack.. Yelah.. makan biskut dan coklat.. Masa di Tesco hari tu pun sama.. tengok budak-budak selamba je makan chips. Orang jual ice-cream pun syok dok standby tepi mini playground... tapi belumlah nampak orang makan ice-cream lagi.

Ada yang bertanya bagaimana nina melatih anak berpuasa.. Haziq, masa 4 tahun dah puasa penuh.. thanks to his teachers who have been supportive.. Irfan pun sebenarnya tengah belajar puasa.. Bukan belajar puasa as in puasa tetapi dia sedang berlatih memahami konsep puasa..

Let me just share with you how we did it! Sebenarnya.. bila dah faham, mereka sendiri yang mahu berpuasa.. Sebenarnya memang tak sampai hati nak tengok mereka berlapar tapi lama-lama mereka biasa..

Here are the tips:

#1 Tanamkan azam berpuasa sebelum Ramadhan tiba
Jangan tunggu bila bulan puasa baru nak ajar.. Beberapa bulan sebelum puasa dah ada countdown.. menunggu-nunggu ketibaan Ramadhan.. Ceritakan tentang pahala berpuasa dan rahmat yang Allah sediakan semasa bulan puasa.. Pasang lampu lip lap menyambut puasa, bukan menyambut raya!

#2 Kejutkan anak bangun sahur
Irfan (3 tahun masa artikel ni ditulis) hari pertama memang bangun sahur.. Hari kedua dan ketiga dia geleng kepala tak nak. Tapi sebelum tidur.. memang cakap dengan dia.. pujuk dia bangun sahur.. Hari keempat sampai sekarang memang dia tak pernah miss sahur.. siap bertambah-tambah nasi!

#3 Beri salam dan 'cheer' kerana bangun sahur
Selalunya bila mereka bangun sahur, nina akan bagi salam setiap seorang yang bangun sahur. Semua orang cheer irfan (wah! irfan bangun sahur! siap tepuk-tepuk lagi!)sebab dia yang baru belajar bangun sahur. Jadi dia suka!

#4 Baca doa masa sahur..
Kami memang baca doa makan.. dan ada doa 'special' untuk sahur. "Sahaja aku makan sahur untuk menghilangkan lapar dan dahaga di bulan puasa kerana Allah Ta'ala". Jadi dah ada mind set..dah sahur, insyaallah tak lapar masa puasa nanti dan yang ini, memang Allah bantu, cubalah!

#5 Makanan biar simple, janji anak suka..
Nasi memang masak pagi, jadi anak-anak makan nasi panas.. Paling mereka suka telur dadar dengan bawang.. Sambil tu, anak-anak makan roti bakar, Koko Krunch dan apa jugak yang mereka suka!

#6 Buka dan sahur dengan kurma
Kami buka dengan kurma, sembahyang, baru makan nasi. Selalu jugak kami cairkan coklat dan makan kurma dengan choc panas. Cairkan coklat 340w (medium) dalam 15 saat. Celup masa coklat panas-panas. Lajulah makan kurma.. Berkat!

#7 Kalau tak puasa, makan bila lapar dan kena menyorok.
Since Irfan sahaja yang tak puasa (3 tahun) dia kena makan bila dia lapar. Dia hanya boleh makan roti sahaja (roti bakar tak boleh.. sebab baunya mengiurkan)..Makan pulak sorang-sorang dalam bilik.. dan tak boleh keluar kecuali bila mulut dah kosong

Sounds evil, kan? tapi memang dia dah faham.. bila bulan puasa, hanya boleh alas perut dan tak boleh makan sedap di siang hari! Sweets and snack are out of the question! Dia pernah mintak.. tapi dia terus cakap "opps! takde takde"!

Sebenarnya tak marah pun.. tapi terangkan dengan baik kat dia.. kesian orang semua puasa.. kalau makan depan orang puasa, nanti orang jadi lapar... dia akan faham

#8 Sogokkan dengan cerita-cerita syurga, bidadari, sungai susu yang mengalir di syurga dan pahala yang Allah beri jika berpuasa..
Pernah sekali Haziq (6 tahun) tak tahan bau peanut butter adik dia makan.. jadi dia nak buka puasa.. Terpaksa sogok dengan bidadari yang memakai kain 70 lapis sedang menunggunya di syurga, tersenyum Haziq mengingatkan bidadarinya.. terus lupa tentang nak buka puasa.

#9 Jangan bagi upah duit untuk hari dia berpuasa
Anak ada yang bercerita dengan nina, kawan-kawan ramai yang dapat duit. Nina cakap, "lebih dari itu pun ibu boleh bagi, kalau ikutkan duit belanja yang dapat tu pun lebih dari seringgit sehari". Terangkan kenapa kita perlu puasa.. terangkan jika bagi duit mereka akan berpuasa kerana duit. Sebenarnya kita berpuasa sebab mahukan keredhaan Allah..

Mereka bukanlah terlalu muda untuk memahami.. sebenarnya mereka lebih senang untuk memahami kerana mereka belum pandai "argue".

#10 Tangisi pemergian Ramadhan
Kira puasa tinggal berapa hari untuk merintih tentang kehilangan Ramadhan.. Ceritakan tentang kemungkinan ini Ramadhan yang terakhir.. Ceritakan juga bagaimana roh-roh yang sudah mati merayu-rayu kepada Allah untuk dikembalikan ke dunia walaupun sekadar sesaat cuma untuk menyebut Subhanallah.. untuk menambah timbangan pahala..

Insyaallah.. kanak-kanak sebenarnya memang ada naluri untuk berpuasa.. Tugas kita hanya untuk memberi ruang kepada mereka dan galakan agar mereka boleh dan gembira berpuasa...

Tugas kita pula sebagai ibu-bapa, perlu beri ruang untuk puasa dan beri galakan. Ada jugak kawan-kawan anak mengadu.. "aku tension betul, aku nak puasa sebenarnya tapi mak aku suruh bukak, takut tak tahan". Cubalah.. tidak ada umur yang terlalu awal untuk melatih puasa. Cuma, bila latih masa umur 3-4 tahun, kalau mereka nak buka puasa.. jangan marah.. Yang penting, mereka faham konsep puasa dan kenapa kena puasa.. Good Luck! Semoga kita sama-sama mendapat keredhaanNya.. Amiin

Tips Melatih Anak Puasa

Trying to be a Perfect Mom? Don't Try too Hard..

Mother's Day has just passed.. Often we think about our own mother on that day rather than thinking about ourself as a mother..

It's a mixed feeling everytime .. We regret the things that we did to our mother and wish we acted differently.. We kept on giving excuses on our actions. We kept on saying that we were just so young to understand the sacrifice.. the hardwork of our mother.. until we become mothers ourselves..

I remember the grudges I had against my mother that lasted for years.. I am among the lucky ones who still have my mother to make up things that I did when I was a teenager.. I remember being angry at my mother for a very very long time before I slowly learnt that it was leading nowhere but pain...

I remember those things that I did that clearly and purposely done to hurt my mother and try really hard to mend it.. It's difficult, I admit, as I will never open up to her the things that I regret (in case she already forgotten about it.. and I really don't want to remind her of those memories). Every raya, I can't even finished what I planned to say.. I'll start crying and pray that she will forgive everything wrongdoing that I've done.

Years have passed and I still have regrets! Regrets on the things that could have been different if only I think before I do things.. Ironically.. I know.. the regrets are mutual.. Deep down inside me, I think she has some regrets too... as a mother..

Sometimes, she will tell us how lucky we are now as there are many parenting books available and how she wishes that the books are there during her time.. She will sometimes be so defensive and come with all sorts of reasons when she sees me doing the same thing that she did to us when we were small... And most importantly.. she shows us the things that she would have done in the past by doing it with her grandchildren.. (things that she never did to us when we were small).. and each time she shows any hint of regret.. I'll let her know how great she is as a mother! and now, it is my turn.. with my kids..

I always promise myself that I'll be a good mother.. A mother who is perfect for her kids.. adored and loved by her kids.. but being human means to make errors.. you can read tonnes of books on parenting and educate ourselves with the knowledge required.. but do remember, we can just try our best.. The way we react will depend on a lot of things.. surrounding.. environment.. your children's reaction.. their own crisis in life.. which is not stated exactly in parenting books.

I pray to Allah.. to be loved unconditionally and forgiven by my kids even when I fail to be as perfect as they want me to be..

Hopefully.. if we follow the basic rules of Islam.. the ways that Allah shows us in Al-Quran and Hadith.. we will be the best parents for our kids.. insyaallah..

Trying to be a Perfect Mom? Don't Try too Hard..

A week break is over

Can't believe that school break is over... I had a long break but it seems too short... Azly's being away from Sunday to Wednesday really tested us as a family. My back pain somehow is a blessing in disguise.. I felt helpless knowing that Azly was in Sarawak, Linda was in Bali, Kak Yana was in Terengganu. At least I have Suri on stand by. Telling my parents would definitely make them jumpy and panicky (Of course they could smell me.. what was i thinking? They were here to fetch me in no time)

However, what I fail to see was my sweet 4 kids eagerly waiting to help me...

Naufal was the earliest on duty, he would be the first to rub my back since i could not move as soon as i wake up, nurul helped preparing things to cook, haziq at least behaved like he was 2 years older than his age and irfan would help sorting his toys and stopped nursing for a while. It was perfect!

The house was not presentable but it was beautiful in my eyes. They washed and dried the laundry. They took turn taking care of me. Naufal was the chef, preparing omellette and burger for the rest of us. I couldnt help feeling bloated for having so many plain water served by them from time to time. I think it was more than the 8 glasses required each day.

While haziq and irfan were sleeping, nurul and naufal were busy piping butter cream into their cupcakes (that they made earlier). Haziq was more than pleased to eat the colourful cuppies. Even i could not resist their work of art.

My back still hurts but then, i gave me a wake up call. I still think that i can do a better job as a mom. Looking at them when i was lying down most of the time makes me wonder.. do i see them as individuals with different strength and ability with tonnes of potential waiting to be tapped or do i just see them as only children.

A week break is over