I was cleaning up my notes and I found a book where I wrote my resolutions last year.. My heart was broken. It were all the same same resolution like this year which means most of them are never accomplished. I have to admit, 2011 was like a roller coaster for me. Despite the unaccomplished resolution, life was at the toughest (I think) and we braved almost all of it. We are now, insyaallah at the end of the roller coaster before another trip of roller coaster that we intend to ride (on our own accord). I remember riding the almost the same roller coaster back then in 2004-2005. We had to cling on to bits and pieces of strength and confidence that we have left in us. Last year or rather, a few months ago, we were reminded by Allah how we felt back then.
It's really strange and weird how we got courage from unexpected people or most of the time strangers. It's good to know who to depend on and who were our foe. Alhamdulillah.. we are grateful for every little help. We do not consider those who backed out as foe, if you ask me the truth.. They were the reasons that we become independent and braver to face judgment and criticism. They were the ones who make us realize that there is strength in us.
The courage and encouragement from people around us.. be it strangers and friends are surely not realized by them at all. I don't even think that they even realized how they have touched our lives positively. We, on the other hand, know exactly who we really owe to. And for this, we tend to cling on to the remarks and encouragement and the trust from them. The time spent, and ears lent are mostly paid back with our prayers to Allah so that they will be helped by others around them the way they helped us.
Mostly we get courage from our kids who makes the best of what we can afford to provide. We are grateful to Allah for having such grateful kids who never really complain or ask for anything. It's sad though, to realize how they have been keeping their needs and necessity to themselves. We never really hide anything from them. Any difficulties that we have are shared with them, not to burden them with the worries, but we believe that they can help especially by praying with us for the best!
Whatever it is.. along the way.. no matter how people affect you.. the one in control is you yourself.. You can't control what people do or say.. but what you can do is to stay as positive as you can and believe that whatever comes in front of you is a test specially for you from Allah the Almighty.. and having said that.. I'd say Alhamdulillah..
Another Circle of Unaccomplished Resolution
